All About That Bass Parody

Because this song's all about being big
 Suck a dick
 Thin people
 If you are super thin
 Super thin
 You're evil
 This catchy tune's message should have been
 "We're equal"
 But it shames thin women, thin women-men-men-men-men
 Yeah it's kind of clear
 I like to eat food
 But I can write big hit songs
 And I can sing 'em too
 I see these skinny girls that get super famous
 So I say "Hey why not Meghan Trainor?"
 I talk like I am black (uh-huh)
 Even though I am white (uh-huh)
 I lived in the Suburbs, I've had a perfect life
 Still there's one thing bugs me (uh-huh)
 I don't know why
 But when I see good looking skinny people
 I think they should die
 Yeah, my mama she told me
 "Don't worry about your size"
 (Ooh, up-up)
 (Uh-ooh, up-up)
 But when I see thin women
 I want to gouge out their eyes
 (Gouge out their eyeballs)
 (Gouge out their eyeballs)
 When I hear Gwyneth Paltrow say
 "Oh my God I feel so fat"
 (Ooh, up-up)
 (Uh-ooh, up-up)
 I want to beat in her pretty face with a baseball bat
 Woah!
 Now all five of us will do this dumb dance, this dumb dance
 We're dancing
 These girls need haircuts bad, really bad
 We can't see
 Meghan give me a chance
 Just one chance, to rest please!
 I hired you to dance
 Damn it dance!
 I'm bringin' booty back
 Booty never left that statement is trash!
 Wow, I'm just playing
 Don't hate me cause I'm fat!
 You're actually normal
 Every inch of you is perfect
 Stop acting like a victim!
 Yeah my mama she told me that "Being big is sexy"
 (Ooh, up-up)
 (Uh-ooh, up-up)
 And that it turns on men which totally validates me!
 (Makes me feel pretty)
 (Makes me feel pretty)
 I thought this song was supposed to be 'bout loving you for you
 (Ooh, up-up)
 It is (Uh-ooh, up-up)
 Then why are you basing yourself worth off of pleasing dudes?
 Now let me reiterate it again
 If you're thin, you're a bitch
 That's totally not true and completely mindless
 I'm actually on my way to help the homeless
 Nice try but that can't be you're skinny
 Meghan your single "All About That Bass" is a hit!
 It's platinum!
 It's time to lose some weight for your next pop anthem
 But I'm about that bass and that means I'm curvy
 That's why everyone like bout this song
 Now Meghan do you wanna be a star
 Or a one-hit wonder?
 If you don't lose some weight
 That would be a blunder
 To help you get in shape
 We've brought in a trainer
 It's time to get you ripped!
 Let's do this!