Whatever You Like (Parody of "Whatever You Like" by T.I.)

Hey girl, you know our economy's in the toilet
 But I'm still going to treat you right
 I said you can have whatever you like (if you like)
 I said you can have whatever you like (if you like)
 Yeah, yeah
 Tater tots, Cold Duck on ice
 And we can clip coupons all night
 And baby you can have whatever you like (if you like)
 I said you can have whatever you like (if you like)
 Yeah, yeah
 Take you out for dinner, anywhere that you please
 Like Burger King or Mickey Ds
 And baby you can have whatever you like (if you like)
 I said you can even have the large fries (large fries)
 Yeah, yeah
 Baby, you should know I am really quite a sweet guy
 When I buy you bathroom tissue I always get the two-ply
 Want it, you can get it, my dear
 I got my Costco membership card right here, yeah
 You like Top Ramen, need Top Ramen
 Got a cupboard full of 'em, I'll keep 'em coming
 You want it, I got it, go get it, just heat it
 Dump the flavor packet on it and eat it
 Pork and beans and Minute Rice
 And we can play Cribbage all night
 And baby you can have whatever you like (if you like)
 I said you can have whatever you like (if you like)
 Yeah, yeah
 I can take you to the laundromat downtown
 And watch all the clothes go round and round
 And baby we can go wherever you like (if you like)
 I said we can go wherever you like (if you like)
 Yeah, yeah
 Hottest shorty I know, if you had some lipo
 You could be second-runner-up Miss Ohio
 Seven dollar bills rolled
 Up inside my plastic billfold
 Buy you a bagel even if it isn't day old
 And you never ever gotta wear your sister's old clothes
 As long as I'm still assistant manager at Kinko's
 Cut your hair with scissors and a soup bowl
 You ain't got to pay me, that's the way that I roll
 My chick can have want she want
 At Wal-mart she can pick out anything she want
 I know girl you ain't never had a man like that
 Who doesn't make you buy generic brand like that, yeah
 You like my Hyundai, see my Hyundai
 I can take you to see your cousin Phil next Sunday
 But that's kind of far and I'm not made of cash
 Do you think you could chip in for gas?
 Mac and Cheese would be all right
 But let's send out for pizza tonight
 And you can order any toppings you like (if you like)
 I said you can even have the last slice (the last slice)
 Yeah, yeah
 Ran myself a cable from my neighbor next do'
 Now I can get free HBO
 And baby you can watch whatever you like (if you like)
 I said you can watch whatever you like (if you like) yeah
 And you can always ride the city bus
 Got a stack of tokens just for us
 Yo, my wallet's fat and full of ones
 It's all about the Washingtons, that's right
 You want White Castle, need White Castle
 Long as you got me it won't be no hassle
 You want it, we'll get it, just don't be a hater
 If I grab a bunch of napkins for later
 Thrift store jeans on sale half-price
 The underwear at Goodwill is nice
 And baby you can have whatever you like (if you like)
 I said you can have whatever you like (if you like)
 Yeah, yeah
 Baby, I can give you anything you please
 Even share my government cheese
 And baby you can have as much as you like (if you like)
 I said you can have as much as you like (if you like)
 Yeah, yeah