Lame Claim to Fame

One time I was in the checkout line
 Behind Steven Seagal
 Once I'm pretty sure Mr. Jonah Hill
 Was in the very next bathroom stall
 My best friend's brother
 Well, he was an extra in Wayne's World 2
 My neighbour's baby sitter
 Dated three of the guys in Motley Crue
 I swear Jack Nicholson
 Looked right at me at a Laker's game
 I got a lame
 Lame claim to fame
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 Check it out, I bought a second hand toaster
 From a guy who says he knows Brad Pitt
 I got me an email from the prince of Nigeria
 Well, he sure sounded legit
 My sister used to take piano lessons
 From the second cousin of Ralph Nader
 Last year I threw up in an elevator
 Next to Christian Slater
 Well guess what, my birthday and Kim Kardashian's
 Are exactly the same
 I got a lame
 Lame claim to fame
 A really lame
 Lame claim to fame
 Once at a party, my dentist accidentally
 Sneezed on Russell Crowe
 I posted first in the comments
 On a YouTube video
 I tried to sit by Steve Buscemi
 But he told me this seat's taken
 I know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy
 Who know a guy who knows a guy who know Kevin Bacon
 I had a car that used to belong
 To Cuba Gooding Jr.'s uncle
 A friend of mine in high school
 Had jury duty with Art Garfunkel
 One time I was staying in the same hotel
 As Zoey Deschanel
 I used the same napkin dispenser
 As Steve Carell at a Taco Bell
 I don't mean to brag but
 Paul Giamatti's plumber knows me by name
 I got a lame
 Lame claim to fame
 A really lame
 Lame claim to fame
 I got a lame
 Lame claim to fame
 A really, really, really lame
 Lame claim to fame
 Ow, let's get lame boys