True Story

This mornin' I jumped on my horse and went out for a ride
 Some wild outlaws chased me and they shot me in the side
 So I crawled into a wild cat's cave to find a place to hide
 But some pirates found me a sleepin' there and soon they had me tied
 'Til a lady zombie cut me loose and begged to be my bride
 So I said I'd come back Wednesday but I must admit I lied
 'Cause I run away into the swamp but I forgot my guide
 And I stepped into some quicksand and no matter how I tried
 I couldn't get out until I met a crocodile named Clyde
 Who took me to some cannibals who planned to have me fried
 They built a fire under me and I swear I almost cried
 'Til an eagle come and swooped me up and through the air we flied
 But he dropped me in a boilin' lake a thousand miles wide
 And you know what happened then?
 (What happened?)
 I died