A Christmas Duel

I bought no gifts this year
 And I slept with your sister
 I know I should have thought twice
 Before I kissed her
 But with the year we had last
 And the dress that she wore
 I just went along for the ride
 And I came back for more
 And I'm sorry baby
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 That's all ok honey cause see
 I bought no tree this year
 And I slept with your brother
 I wrecked your Daddy's car
 And went down on your Mother
 I set your record collection on fire
 And said I never knew
 Felt kind of bad about that
 And I know you did too
 So whatever you say
 It's all fine by me
 Who the fuck anyway wants a Christmas tree
 Cause the snow keeps on fallin'
 Even though we were bad
 It'll cover the filth
 We should both just be glad
 And spend-spend-spend this Chris-Christmas together
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 I married you last year
 Bet you thought I was sober, right?
 But I was drunk as a skunk and I made a mistake
 This could all have been over
 Ah honey please don't
 Excuse your behaviour
 Cause I hired a hitman and changed your will
 It's now all in my favour
 So whatever you say, it's all fine by me
 Who the fuck anyway wants a Christmas tree
 Cause the snow keeps on fallin'
 Even though we were bad
 It'll cover the filth
 We should both just be glad
 And spend-spend-spend this Chris-Christmas together
 And spend-spend-spend this Chris-Christmas together
 And spend-spend-spend this Chris-Christmas together
 And spend-spend-spend this Chris-Christmas together
 Holding on without any reason
 Cause something's strong this holiday season
 So whatever you say, it's all fine by me
 And who the fuck anyway wants a Christmas tree
 Cause the snow keeps on fallin'
 Even though we were bad
 It'll cover the filth
 We should both just be glad
 And spend-spend this Christmas together
 And spend-spend-spend this Chris-Christmas together
 And spend-spend-spend this Chris-Christmas together
 And spend-spend-spend this Chris-Christmas together