Oh Sweet Woods

Oh sweet woods
 I was in tahoe, on the california side
 Waiting in the lobby at 665 1/2 frontage road
 When two extra-blond, short-sleeve, button-down
 White-shirt, blue-tie, mystery mormons
 Came in and put this music on
 Came in and took me by the arm
 And as they had me marching through the parking lot
 And as they were marching through the parking lot
 They blew into their shirt-pocket microphones
 Like this
 And then they drove me to an albertson's outside of boise
 And took me into a back room.
 And they said they wanted to balance my checkbook
 And they said the wanted to organize my receipts
 And itemize my expenses
 And that i had the key
 To a safety deposit box
 With treasury bonds and the key
 To another safety deposit box
 Where i'd stashed away
 The only pewter pocket watch
 That ever belonged to
 Joseph smith's great-great uncle's brother-in-law
 And i said you've got the wrong eleanor friedberger.
 And then they sang at me like this