Company - Original Broadway Cast: Getting Married Today

CHOIRGIRL:  Bless this day,
 Pinnacle of life,
 Husband joined to wife.
 The heart leaps up to behold
 This golden day.
 PAUL:  Today is for Amy,
 Amy, I give you the rest of my life,
 To cherish and to keep you, to honor you forever.
 Today is for Amy,
 My happily soon-to-be wife.
 AMY:  Pardon me, is everybody there? Because if everybody's there,
 I want to thank you all for coming to the wedding,
 I'd appreciate your going even more,
 I mean you must have lots of better things to do,
 and not a word of this to Paul, remember Paul, you know,
 the man I'm gonna marry, but I'm not,
 because I wouldn't ruin anyone as wonderful as he is
 But I thank you all For the gifts and the flowers,
 Thank you all, Now it's back to the showers,
 Don't tell Paul, But I'm not getting married today.
 CHOIRGIRL:  Bless this day,
 Tragedy of life,
 Husband yoked to wife.
 The heart sinks down and feels dead
 This dreadful day.
 AMY:  Listen, everybody, look, I don't know what you're waiting for,
 a wedding, what's a wedding,
 it's a prehistoric ritual where everybody promises fidelity forever,
 which is maybe the most horrifying word I ever heard of,
 which is followed by a honeymoon,
 where suddenly he'll realize he's saddled
 with a nut, and wanna kill me, which he should--
 So listen, thanks a bunch, But I'm not getting married--
 Go have lunch, Cause I'm not getting married--
 You've been grand, But I'm not getting married--
 Don't just stand there, I'm not getting married--
 And don't tell Paul, But I'm not getting married today.
 Go, can't you go?
 Why is no-Body listening?
 Goodbye, Go and cry
 At another person's wake.
 If you're quick, For a kick,
 You could pick Up a christening,
 But please, On my knees,
 There's a human life at stake!
 Listen everybody, I'm afraid you didn't hear,
 or do you want to see a crazy lady fall apart in front of you,
 it isn't only Paul who may be ruining his life,
 you know we'll both of us be losing our identities,
 I telephoned my analyst about it and he said to see him Monday,
 but by Monday I'll be floating in the Hudson with the other garbage--
 I'm not well, So I'm not getting married--
 You've been swell, But I'm not getting married--
 Clear the hall, Cause I'm not getting married--
 Thank you all, But I'm not getting married--
 And don't tell Paul, But I'm not getting married today.
 CHOIRGIRL:  Bless this bride,
 Totally insane,
 Slipping down the drain.
 And bless this day in our hearts
 As it starts
 To rain.
 PAUL:  Today is for Amy AMY:  Go, can't you go?
 PAUL:  Amy, I give you the rest of my life AMY:  Look,
 you know I adore you all But why Watch me die, Like Eliza on the ice?
 PAUL:  To cherish and to keep you, to honor you forever AMY:
 Look, perhaps I'll collapse In the apse Right before you all,
 PAUL:  Today is for Amy, my happily,
 soon-to-be wife AMY:
 So take Back the cake, Burn the shoes and boil the rice.
 Look, I didn't wanna have to My adorable tell you,
 but I may be coming Wife. down with Hepatitis,
 and I think I'm gonna faint, so if you wanna see me faint,
 I'll do it happily,
 but wouldn't it be funnier to go and watch a funeral,
 so thank you for the twenty-seven dinner plates,
 thirty-seven butter knives,
 forty-seven paperweights, fifty-seven candleholders--
 PAUL:  One more thing-- AMY:  I am not getting married! CHOIR:  Amen!
 PAUL:  Softly said-- AMY:  But I'm not getting married CHOIR:  Amen!
 PAUL:  With this ring-- AMY:  Still I'm not getting married CHOIR:  Amen!
 PAUL:  I thee wed. AMY:  See, I'm not getting married CHOIR:  Amen!
 PAUL:  AMY:  Let us pray Let us pray That we are
 getting married That I'm not getting married Today! Today!
 CHOIR:  AMEN!!!