Grandfather

When Grandfather dies
 Life will be strange
 When Grandfather dies
 My whole world will change
 When Grandfather dies
 I'll scream and I'll yell
 'Cause I'll be fuckin' rich as hell
 So Grandfather, die
 Don't keep me in suspense
 Oh Grandfather, cough
 Up that inheritance
 Oh Grandfather, don't
 Hold on another day
 I love you to death
 But I've gots bills to pay
 A stroke would be nice
 Disease would be cool
 I'll scatter his ashes
 In my new swimming pool
 I'll party with Hef
 I'll dine with the Queen
 So what say we unplug that machine?
 Oh Grandfather, die
 Before the fiscal year
 Oh Grandfather, I
 Wish Kevorkian were here
 Oh Grandfather, fly
 Just take your final bow
 Oh Grandfather, die
 Family hates you anyhow
 For God's sakes, you must be as old as the sun
 Your Social Security Number is 1
 You're deaf, dumb, and blind, and an amputee
 You donate your blood every time that you pee
 Your arthritis acts up whenever it rains
 You're so old your penis has varicose veins
 Oh, why don't you die, Grandpa?
 Why must you fight?
 You old motherfucker
 Just walk toward the goddamn light
 ♪
 Walk toward the light, old man
 Walk toward the light, old man
 
 It's all over now
 My granddad is dead
 A mysterious blow
 To his wrinkled old head
 Before I collect
 A small oversight
 But everything should work out all right
 I'll start working on my grandma tonight