Very Poorly Concealed Secret Track

P-I-N-G P-O-N-G
 P-I-N-G P-O-N-G
 P-I-N-G P-O-N-G
 P-I-N-G P-
 Sipping perrier, playing ping pong
 Movin' up the ranks y'all
 Hey man you know there's nothin' wrong
 With the late night battle
 I always stay prepared
 Got my paddle in my backpack
 Challenger's beware.
 With the P-I-N-G
 Volley for the serve, hit it nice and easy
 See we got these regulations, for a tournament
 O.R.P.P.R.B., check the document
 I'll officiate, your event, keep it on the level
 Inspect the surfaces, arguments are settled
 Scrutinize the nets, keep 'em taut and snappy
 Rock the color commentary, keep the people happy
 It's on. the day starts just before dawn,
 Brobot's on the front lawn, giving seminars
 On the finer arts like brutal back hand hits
 People linin' up, earnin' new certificates
 Check the merchandise, man Grimmy thought of everything
 Sweat bands up to grand champion rings
 It means that nobody leaves empty-handed
 Every last ball on the court's O.R.P.P.R.B. branded
 Demand from my sponsors is big and getting better
 See me at the match in my ping pong sweater
 In the locker room, lifting weights, getting strong
 Sipping perrier, playing ping pong
 What? Yo, they challenge me? To a sanctioned event?
 It went quick with the skunk, yeah love zero 6
 Top Spin smashes, stops them dead in their tracks
 You see the way I relax is winnin' ping pong matches
 Victories are comin' in batches
 When I practice, it's back hand --- back hand again
 Forehand, no return practice sideways spin
 The skin on my paddle's kinda floppy
 But it don't stop me, I'll win in any condition
 While you wishin' that you could scout out my style and try to copy
 I'm in Japan learning secret paddle positions
 I'm on a steady diet: sashimi to gohan
 I eat with my fingers consult the masters for advice:
 You can excel, grasshopper, if you're willing to pay the price!
 Keep your eyes on the ball. Grip the paddle like a friend.
 You don't have to have telekinesis but pretend
 like you do. Aim the sphere around the court.
 Enter into the slow motion so that time & space distort.
 Make report with the paddle; pick pock how it go.
 Pop-lock as you wield it; feel the ball flow
 against the counter-currents of the motions you make.
 You might mistake it for a simple game of angles, but it ain't.
 Now taint the universe with the flavor of your game,
 tilt reality around the ball to shape the lane
 of its travel. But do not let it unravel fate:
 don't return a volley if it's already too late.
 It's unfair to your opponent how you move through air,
 how you throw away your paddle -- in the back pocket got a spare,
 how you dared him to serve before you got in the room,
 how he tried but the net cradled each as a womb.
 Now, assuming that you've got all my lessons ignored...
 See me at the Comfort Inn on the World Tour
 It's 4 a.m., I'm eatin' continental breakfast
 The competition don't expect this
 A new serve from Mr. Cyberman, an ace is quite effective
 I'm happy as long as my ladder post is protected
 Our gear's not the tightest, is all that we found
 That table might wobble but it don't fall down.
 We're in the locker room liftin' weights, gettin' strong
 Sippin' Perrier, playing ping pong
 Every ball is branded, serve it left-handed,
 O.R.P.P.R.B., see the label and demand it
 It can get kinda crazy, you understand it
 It don't phase me, it's the just the way that we planned it.
 Every ball is branded, serve it left-handed,
 O.R.P.P.R.B., see the label and demand it
 It can get kinda crazy, you understand it
 It don't phase me, it's the just the way that we planned it.