Montage, Part 2: Nothing

So excited because I'm gonna go to the high school of performing arts!
 I mean, I was dying to be a serious actress
 Anyway, it's the first day of acting class and we're in the auditorium and the teacher, Mr. Karp
 Oh, Mr Karp
 Anyway, he puts us up on the stage with our legs around each other, one in back of the other
 And he says, "Okay, we're gonna do improvisations
 Now, you're on a bobsled
 It's snowing out, and it's cold
 Okay, go"
 Every day for a week we would try to feel the motion
 Feel the motion
 Down the hill
 Every day for a week we would try to hear the wind rush
 Hear the wind rush
 Feel the chill
 And I dug right down to the bottom of my soul to see what I had inside
 Yes, I dug right down to the bottom of my soul
 And I tried, I tried!
 And everybody's going "Woosh! Woosh!
 I feel the snow, I feel the cold, I feel the air!"
 And Karp turns to me, and he says
 "Okay Morales, what did you feel?"
 And I said
 "Nothing, I'm feeling nothing"
 And he said
 "Nothing could get a girl transferred"
 They all felt something
 But I felt nothing
 Except the feeling that this bullshit was absurd
 But I said to myself, "Hey, it's only the first week
 Maybe it's genetic!
 They don't have bobsleds in San Juan"
 Second week!
 More advanced and we had to be a table
 Be a sports car
 Ice cream cone
 Mr. Karp, he would say "Very good!
 Except Morales
 Try Morales
 All alone "
 So I dug right down to the bottom of my soul
 To see how an ice cream felt
 Yes, I dug right down to the bottom of my soul
 And I tried to melt
 The kids yelled "Nothing!"
 They called me "nothing"
 And Karp allowed it
 Which really makes me burn
 They were so helpful
 They called me hopeless
 Until I really didn't know where else to turn
 And Karp kept saying
 "Morales, I think you should transfer to Girls High
 You'll never be an actress, never"
 Jesus Christ!
 Went to church
 Praying "Santa Maria, send me guidance!
 Send me guidance"
 On my knees
 Went to church
 Praying "Santa Maria, help me feel it!
 Help me feel it
 Pretty please"
 And a voice from down at the bottom of my soul came up to the top of my head
 And the voice from down at the bottom of my soul
 Here is what it said
 "This man is nothing!
 This course is nothing!
 If you want something, go find a better class
 And when you find one
 You'll be an actress"
 And I assure you that's what finally came to pass
 Six months later I heard that Karp had died
 And I dug right down to the bottom of my soul
 And cried
 'Cause I felt
 Nothing
 I mean I didn't want him to die or anything but-
 The summer I turned fifteen I lied about my age
 So I could join AGVA
 You know, the night club union
 'Cause I could make sixty dollars a week
 Workin' these strip joints outside of Kansas City
 I worked this one club for about eight weeks straight
 And I really became friendly with this stripper
 Her name was Lola Latores
 And her dynamic twin forty-fours
 Well, she really took to me
 I mean, we did share the only dressing room and she did a lot of dressing
 Anyway, she used to come and pick me up
 And drive me to work nights
 Well, the neighbors would all be hanging outside their windows
 And she'd drive up in her big pink Cadillac
 Convertible
 And smile
 And then I'd come tripping out of my house
 With my little tuxedo on and my tap shoes in my hand
 And we'd just take off down the block-
 Goodbye twelve (With her long)
 Goodbye thirteen (flaming, red hair)
 Hello, love! (just blowing in the wind!)
 Why do I pay for all those lessons?
 Dance for Grandma!
 Dance for Grandma!
 My God, that Steve McQueen's real sexy!
 Bob Goulet out!
 Steve McQueen in!
 You cannot go to the movies until you finish your homework!
 Wash the car!
 Stop picking your nose!
 Oh darling, you're not old enough to wear a bra
 You've got nothing to hold it up!
 Locked in the bathroom with Peyton Place
 Tits! When am I gonna grow tits?
 If Troy Donahue could be a movie star, then I could be a movie star
 Well, when the guys on the block saw Lola, they all wanted to know what the story was
 So I told them about this big hot, heavy, romance we were having
 But actually, she was going with this-
 Little brat!
 That's what my sister was!
 A little brat!
 And that's why I shaved her head!
 I'm glad I shaved her head!
 But then my father lost his job
 So we had to leave El Paso
 And we wound up in St. Louis, Missouri
 Well, it was the furthest thing from my mind
 To be a dancer but my mother would embarrass me so
 When she'd come to pick me up at school
 With all those great, big, yellow rollers in her hair
 No matter how much I begged her and she'd say
 "What? Are you ashamed of your own mother?"
 But the thing that made my daddy laugh so much
 Was when I used to jump and dance around the living room