We Carry the Feeling

Search through the sky for a sign or a simple suggestion
 I waited all night, but I was fast asleep when it knocked upon my door
 It gets lonely here when it's just me and my questions
 Jetsam in the Ether, pulsars pull not drawing anymore
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 I remember it like yesterday
 Thought that you were lovely, I just didn't know what to say
 There's all these protocols that get in the way
 We were on the edge of seventeen
 All we knew to say were things we didn't mean
 I still impressed you with my wit, it seemed
 I learned so much from magazines and television
 About how men relate through rules to tell them how
 Oh, I saw the signals with precision
 The moments when our habits faltered
 Omens of desires unhaltered
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 It wasn't long 'til we were sharing beds
 With different dressings on the dreams appearing in our heads
 I wanted a lover, you a brother instead
 Either way, these things were hard to name
 Me, always wondering, did we feel the same?
 And after a while, all I could feel was shame
 Stef said I shouldn't see you anymore
 Clyde, they tried to call me on the phone to say
 Some Love's Labout Lost, oh, but I'm never sure
 There's nothing they could tell me ever
 Made me really want to be alone
 And I felt a funny face
 Was a worthless waste, caught a hopeless case
 For sweet boys on sweaty days
 Don't know what we craved, it remains unspoken
 The longing outlived the place
 Our artistic taste, it outlived the clothes we wore
 When I feel uncertain now
 I remember how we carry the feeling
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 Those were stories that we saved for dark
 Lost the plot before they'd even start
 Except once when we were drunk and then you kissed me hard
 And so, I faded to a distant star
 In the brightest company, but everything's so far
 Thinking lifetimes pass us, gaseous, things just stay as they are
 I tried to chalk it up to expectation
 Or believe that what I wanted was just wrong
 But now I better understand assimilation
 I closed ranks among the ones who felt I
 Only quite belonged among them
 And I felt a funny face
 Was a worthless waste, caught a hopeless case
 For sweet boys on sweaty days
 Don't know what we craved, it remains unspoken
 The longing outlived the place
 Our artistic taste, it outlived the clothes we wore
 When I feel uncertain now
 I remember how we carry the feeling