Oskar Tennis Champion

Uncle Oskar, an intensely idealistic tennis star
 Goes to see a guru at an architecture seminar
 It seems the radiant city will soon be ushered in
 Where all things will be modular and rational and clean
 Green space, tennis, pleasures all planned
 And nothing, says the man, to fear or fail to understand
 The world will be 'Ein Lichtspiel Schwartz-Weiss-Grau'
 As predicted by the experts at the Bauhaus, Dessau
 Oh, Oskar Tennis Champion, we're sorry for your frau
 Now Moholy Nagy is your holy cow
 My uncle is inspired to start his dream home right away
 He steps out of the hall, but in his hurry, to his great dismay
 He fails to see the rake, it bangs him in the face
 Causing him to trip and, to his horror and disgrace
 A barrel of molasses hanging dangling in the sky
 Falls upon my uncle and it hits him in the eye
 It trickles down his back, my uncle's quickly stuck
 To the sleepers of the nearby monorail track
 Oh, Oskar Tennis Champion, uh-oh wow
 Who but Le Corbusier could save you now?
 Next time we see our hero two experimental trains
 Are hurtling down the monorail towards my uncle's balls and brains
 Then comes a bolt of lightning, a sudden cut in power
 My uncle sees the whole façade of a residential tower
 Crashing down towards him, he doesn't worry though
 His survival is assured by the position of the window
 Oh, Oskar Tennis Champion, what's up doc?
 Help, he goes, send Adolf Loos or the Keystone Cops!
 Oh, Oskar Tennis Champion, it's all gone wrong
 Who knew you'd see Utopia but you'd be King Kong?
 Oskar Tennis Champion, uh-oh wow
 Can pompous Walter Gropius save you now?
 Ultra-modernism it's a drag
 When Jacques Tati and Buster Keaton write your gags