ADDICTION

And I don't even know how I got this far
 Don't even bother tryna save me
 I don't like the drugs, but the drugs like me
 Everything I want, but I'm still dying
 Even when I'm down, know I'm still trying
 I'm not really living, I'm just surviving
 I've been lookin' for my purpose again
 And I'm barely hangin' on by a thread
 It's been gettin' too hard to pretend
 I just wanna let go of my sins
 Callin' out for help, but I don't got no one to talk to
 Try to be a better man, but it always falls through
 I'm feelin' like a disappointment, I'm hearin' voices
 I've been on the edge again
 And you know it's hard to be myself sometimes
 When I only want what's worse for me
 And I hate what I became, now I'm so stressed out
 Tried to medicate to push these thoughts out
 All alone, I don't wanna need these pills to function
 I supply my own destruction
 I wish life came with instructions
 Maybe then I'd finally change
 I don't like the drugs, but the drugs like me
 Everything I want, but I'm still dying
 Even when I'm down, know I'm still trying
 I'm not really living, I'm just surviving
 I've been lookin' for my purpose again
 And I'm barely hangin' on by a thread
 It's been gettin' too hard to pretend
 I just wanna let go of my sins
 Withdrawals, they go on and on
 It's been so long, but I'm hangin' on
 And I've been lettin' the ones down that love me
 I just push 'em away
 'Cause I don't even know myself or who I am
 These days embrace pain to try and feel something
 And I don't even know how I got this far
 Don't even bother tryna save me
 All alone, I don't wanna need these pills to function
 I supply my own destruction
 I wish life came with instructions
 Maybe then I'd finally change
 I don't like the drugs, but the drugs like me
 Everything I want, but I'm still dying
 Even when I'm down, know I'm still trying
 I'm not really living, I'm just surviving
 I've been lookin' for my purpose again
 And I'm barely hangin' on by a thread
 It's been gettin' too hard to pretend
 I just wanna let go of my sins