Dance: Ten; Looks: Three

I swiped my dance card once after an audition
 And on a scale of ten they gave me
 For dance
 Ten
 For looks
 Three
 Well!
 Dance, ten, looks, three
 And I'm still on unemployment
 Dancing for my own enjoyment
 That ain't it, kid, That ain't it, kid!
 Dance, ten, looks, three
 Is like to die
 Left the theater
 And called the doctor
 For my appointment to buy
 Tits and ass
 Bought myself a fancy pair
 Tightened up the derriere
 Did the nose with it
 All that goes with it!
 Tits and ass
 Had the bingo-bongos done
 Suddenly I'm getting national tours
 Tits and ass won't get you jobs
 Unless they're yours
 Didn't cost a fortune neither
 Didn't hurt my sex life either
 Flat and sassy
 I would get the strays and losers
 Beggars really can't be choosers
 That ain't it, kid, that ain't it, kid
 Fix the chassis,"How do you do"
 Life turned into an
 Endless medley of
 "Gee, it had to be you"
 Why?
 Tits and ass
 Where the cupboard once was bare
 Now you knock and someone's there
 You have got 'em, hey, top to bottom, hey
 It's a gas
 Just a dash of silicone
 Shake your new maracas and you're fine
 Tits and ass can change your life
 They sure changed mine
 ♪
 You're all looking at my tits now, aren't you?
 Have it all done
 Honey, take my word
 Grab a cab, c'mon
 See the wizard on
 Park and seventy-third
 For
 Tits and ass
 Orchestra and balcony
 What they want is what ya see
 Keep the best of you
 Do the rest of you
 Pits or class
 I have never seen it fail
 Debutante or chorus girl or wife
 Tits and ass
 Yes, tits and ass
 Have changed my life!