Having Been Is No Way To Be

Oh, I was naive
 My shoes were untied
 In Heaven everything is just fine
 But the phones are dead
 And so is the light
 And so are you
 And, honey, so am I
 But the Earth still turns
 For the unconcerned
 Days pass below like train windows
 I was a sapling tree
 The birds looked like me
 Oh, I begged my nerves to kick me something new
 From time to time
 I'd watch you sleep
 Oh, I wonder how much freedom we can dream
 And I'm sorry when you wake up to me
 I just got tired
 Shining steady like a spider web's an empty stage
 Now people say
 What drugs did you take
 And why don't you start taking them again?
 But they're not my friends
 And if I was dead
 What difference would it ever make to them
 If I got high?
 From time to time
 Oh, I wonder how much freedom you would need
 And I'd be sorry when you wake up to me
 ♪
 I'm reaching out to you
 I'm writing all the time
 I don't see deep but I see far and wide
 I see dead trees
 But the roots have leaves
 Just because I can't describe it doesn't mean I shouldn't try
 To untwist the knife
 To unmake my mind
 Having been is no way to be alive
 And I'm alive
 When I watch you sleep
 I wonder how much freedom we need
 And I'm here when you wake up to me
 And I'm still here when you wake up to me