(It's) Hairspray

And now, broadcast live in front of a live studio audience
 For the first time from the certified, up to code, WYDT Studio
 It's The Corny Collins Miss Hairspray Spectacular
 He's Corny
 Brought to you by Ultra Clutch Hairspray
 What gives a girl
 Power and punch?
 Is it charm, is it poise?
 No, it's hairspray
 What gets a gal
 Asked out to lunch?
 Is it brains, is it dough?
 No, it's hairspray
 If you take a ride
 With no can at your side
 Then your flip will be gone
 With the wind
 But if you spray it and lock it
 You can take off in a rocket
 And in outer space
 Each hair will be in place
 Why take a chance
 When you get up and dance?
 If you twist, I insist
 You use hairspray
 And tell your mother
 Her head, she should smother
 With Ultra Clutch faithfully
 So if you're a redhead, a blond or brunette
 Just take my advice and you might just get
 The only thing better than hairspray that's me
 Ska-doo-dle-e-ya-do-wah
 Forget the milkman
 The only thing better than hairspray
 Hairspray, wow
 That's me
 What makes a man
 Reach out and touch?
 Ultra Clutch
 So if you're a redhead, a blond or brunette, ooh
 Just take my advice and you might just get
 You might just
 The only thing better than hairspray, that's me
 Ska-doo-dle-e-ya-do-wah
 He's Corny Collins
 The only thing better than hairspray
 Hairspray, wow!
 That's me
 Ska-doo-dle-e-ya do wah
 Ska-doo-dle-e-ya do wah, do wah
 Hey, baby, you look like you could use a stiff one
 Ska-doo-dle-e-ya