Father

Hi, uh-uhhh, what's up? My name's Frank
 Uh Hobo Johnson I hope you like this song
 I made it up for my dad, it's for you, Dad, hey
 My dad taught me 'bout
 The story 'bout the birds and the bees
 When the bees turn into wasps and take half of everything
 He sounded sure
 That a bird doesn't need a full nest
 But a bed for our bird heads to rest
 He told me son you'll never dunk (WHAT?)
 It's family tradition basketball is not for us
 Our legs just aren't that springy
 My great great uncle almost did but he didn't
 He told me son beware
 Of the monsters that roam the depths of your head
 Sometimes they'll make you real sad or
 Or real real mad, or real real jealous and
 That's real real bad, boy breathe
 Nicotine until you fall asleep like all of our family, breathe
 Nicotine until you fall asleep
 Like all of our family, like all of our family, like
 I'm the new Will Smith
 I'm-I'm Will Smith mixed with Michael Cera
 I'm Will Smith, Michael Cera
 Kevin Spacey
 Michael Cera
 My father's married to a shape shifting monster
 Who can sometimes take the form
 Of a really really really nice woman
 And although that seems super fucking frightening
 Sometimes this scary monster makes
 A really really great vanilla pudding, he has courage
 But sometimes your courage isn't quite the kryptonite
 As the monster runs rampant through the house
 Sometimes your courage makes you feel strong
 But it seems as if the monster eats your muscles all along
 Fucking pickin out your self respect right out it's scary teeth
 Her breath smells like pride of self
 And other men she used to meet
 And the monster doesn't sleep just schemes and fiends
 On the next tasty meal it gets to eat
 It gets to eat, it gets to eat
 I'm the new Will Smith
 I'm mixed with Kevin Spacy
 I'm the new Will Smith, Kevin Spacey, Michael Cera
 What the fuck