Daddy’s Girl

Don't believe a word of my mother
 Interfering pain in the can
 Burning up with unspoken envy
 I got me a bona fide man (don't change the subject!)
 She and Daddy don't have relations
 Separate rooms with double-locked doors
 S-E-X for her and her eunuch
 Stopped at the Punic Wars
 I'm my daddy's girl
 Chip off the old man's block
 Yes, my daddy's girl
 Proper and prim as Plymouth Rock
 Take off that lipstick
 Wash off that perfume
 How dare you wear high heels?
 As my daddy's girl
 I'm impassioned by
 Good, old-fashioned ideals
 Father will be home soon enough
 Talk to him, Joe
 Why?
 Why, because he's willing to cover for you?
 Because he loves me!
 Because he isn't competing
 Mother has a yen for the spotlight
 Daddy disapproves of the stage
 Never get your name in the papers
 Except for the nuptial page (now Edie, I -)
 Modulate your voice to a whisper
 Always hide your sexual side (that's enough!)
 As for getting drunk in that frat-house (what?)
 Father O'Hanlan lied!
 I'm my daddy's girl (what frathouse?)
 Virginal as a saint
 That's my daddy's girl (Father O'Hanlan?)
 Model of utter self-restraint
 Insinuations, false accusations
 Slander from Harvard boys (who?!)
 On a daddy's girl
 I ignore 'em with charm, decorum and poise
 Edie
 Before he gets married
 There are certain things that a guy's gotta know!
 I'm a good girl!
 A Miss Porter's girl!
 All American apple pie
 Catholic as the Pope's right eye
 In here, Joe
 My heart, Joe
 I'm pure
 Maybe not like the driven snow
 All the same, next to some I know
 Girls who smoke and read Fanny Hill
 Well, I was reading de Tocqueville
 Listen to reason
 Let's not be immature
 Honestly, Joe
 I thought you said that you were sure
 I know what I said
 I'm his daughter, Joe
 Not hers
 I want to believe you-
 Believe me!
 Believe Daddy!
 He'll make it right, I know he will
 Over a nice Scotch, or a Cuban cigar
 You'll see!
 Edie, I just-
 Please!
 All right
 All right, one whiskey
 In his study
 Tell him only what you know about me, Daddy
 Not what you don't
 I'm my daddy's girl
 Used to his stony glares
 And I know deep down
 He's just critical 'cause he cares
 "Go find a husband!"
 "Don't waste your life on talent you have none of"
 How can any man
 Even Joe
 Match the gift of a father's love?