Monotony

Well, we're making conversation
 it's one-way communication
 as you chat next to the side of me
 And I'm working on a theory
 that your thick barrage of queries
 makes me wish for a lobotomy
 And I have a deep suspicion
 that your constant repetition
 means you have no working memory
 And I know I'm not much better
 but I wish I were unfettered
 cuz I need to have variety
 and then somebody drives up the sidewalk
 the car heads straight at me
 I would only welcome a collision
 if it just would break monotony
 (just break monotony) monotony
 (if it just would break monotony)
 Well, we're glaring at the tv
 and it's Regis and Kathy Lee
 They're a foghorn and a smiley face
 But today's a boring panel
 so we go and switch the channel
 and we're calling this a change of pace
 well then there's Oprah & there's Liza
 and Sally Jesse Raphael
 who are crying and beating men
 there's The View and good old Rosie
 who are gossipy and nosy
 and they laugh at the expense of men
 and if someone would fire a missile
 and aim it straight at me
 I would only welcome detonation
 if it just would break monotony
 (just break monotony) monotony
 (if it just would break monotony)
 Well my job's a cracker-salter
 I work hard and never falter
 as they come down the conveyor line
 Those crackers I do salt them
 but my bosses I must fault them
 'cause they never pay me overtime
 And it's cracker after cracker
 heading toward the cracker stacker
 I take caffeine pills so I never tire
 it's like sorting daily mail
 where there's never room to fail
 and one day I think I'll open fire.
 Don't you know that it's the same job,
 same home,
 same red welcome mat
 and then there is the treadmill rusting in
 the space it's at
 It's where I hang coat and hat
 that's probably why I'm still fat
 We eat only meat and taters
 and we undertip our waiters
 for desert we share a derby pie
 then we rent a motion picture
 and become a sofa fixture
 I say the film's okay but I lie
 our life seems to be modeled
 after prose on shampoo bottles
 where they say to lather, rinse and repeat
 well we're latherin and rinsin
 and for me it is convincin
 that I'm getting much to tired to repeat
 and oh thank goodness here comes the chorus
 a varied melody
 I would only welcome variation
 if it just could break monotony
 (let's break monotony) monotony
 (if we just could break monotony)