(It's) Hairspray

And now, live from the certified up to code Baltimore Eventorium
 For the first time ever on nationwide television
 It's the Corny Collins spectacular
 He's Corny!
 Brought to you by Ultra Clutch hairspray!
 What gives a girl power and punch?
 Is it charm, is it poise?
 No it's hairspray
 What gets a gal asked out to lunch?
 Is it brains, is it dough?
 No it's hairspray
 If you take a ride with no can at your side
 Then your flip will be gone with the wind
 But if you spray it and lock it
 You can take off in a rocket
 And in Outer Space each hair will be in place
 Why take a chance when you get up and dance?
 If you twist, I insist you use hairspray
 And tell your mother her head she should smother
 With Ultra Clutch faithfully
 So, if you're a redhead, a blonde or brunette
 Just take my advice and you might just get (You might just get)
 The only thing better than hairspray
 That's me!
 Forget the milkman
 The only thing better than hairspray (Hairspray, wow!)
 That's me
 ♪
 What makes a man reach out and touch?
 Ultra Clutch!
 So, if you're a redhead, a blonde or brunette
 Just take my advise and you might just get (You might just get)
 The only thing better than hairspray
 That's me
 He's Corny Collins!
 The only thing better than hairspray (Hairspray, wow!)
 That's me
 Ska-doo-dle-e-ya do wah, ska-doo-da-doo-wah, doo-wah
 Hey, baby, you look like you could use a stiff one!
 Ska-doo-dle-e-ya do wah!