Bigger on the Inside

One, two, three, four
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 You'd think I'd shot their children
 From the way that they are talking
 And there's no point in responding
 'Cause it will not make them stop
 And I am tired of explaining
 And of seeing so much hating
 In the very same safe haven
 Where I used to just see helping
 I've been drunk and skipping dinner
 Eating skin from off my fingers
 And I tried to call my brother
 But he no longer exists
 I keep forgetting to remember
 That he would have been much prouder
 If he saw me shake these insults off
 Instead of getting bitter
 I am bigger on the inside
 But you have to come inside to see me
 Otherwise you're only hating
 Other people's low-res copies
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 You'd think I'd learn my lesson
 From the way they keep on testing
 My capacity for pain
 And my resolve to not get violent
 But though my skin is thickened
 Certain spots can still be gotten
 It is typically human of me
 Thinking I am different
 To friends hooked up to hospital machines
 To fix their cancer
 And there is no better place than from this
 Waiting room to answer
 The French kid who sent an email
 To the website late last night
 His father raped him and he's scared
 He asked me
 How do you keep fighting?
 And the truth is I don't know
 I think it's funny that he asked me
 'Cause I don't feel like a fighter lately
 I am too unhappy
 You are bigger on the inside
 But your father cannot see
 You need to tell someone, be strong
 And somewhere some dumb rock star truly loves you
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 You'd think I'd get perspective
 From my view here by the bedside
 It is difficult to see the ones I love
 So close to death
 All their infections and prescriptions
 And the will to live at all in question
 Can I not accept that my own problems
 Are so small?
 You took my hand when you woke up
 I had been crying in the darkness
 We all die alone but I am so, so glad
 That you are here, you whispered
 We are so much bigger on the inside
 You, me, everybody
 Some day when you're lying where I am
 You'll finally get it, beauty
 We are so much bigger
 Than another one can ever see, but
 Trying is the point of life
 So don't stop trying
 Promise me