Classical Teacher

Hey Kage
 Jables
 How goes it man?
 It's good, it's good
 You know I've been thinkin' a lot about it
 And um, I just want us to be the best fuckin' band in the world
 Well, yeah, me too
 I mean, there's no point in doin' it if we're not the best
 Well, it's true, I agree with that
 I mean what, what, we're gonna be, yeah we're really good
 We're almost as good as Arcade Fire, fuck that
 Yeah
 We gotta leave those fuckers in the dust
 What, what do you mean?
 All those fuckin' youngsters gotta lick our boot or fuck it
 You know what I mean?
 Yeah, yeah, well how do we do that though?
 Dude, you need to fuckin' have some lessons
 What
 You know you're really good, but you gotta expand your game
 Lessons?
 You know how Kobe, in the off-season, will go and like
 Learn a fuckin', you know, a Texas-two-step or somethin'
 To add to his arsenal?
 Yeah, that's true, that's true
 Well I've just been noticing
 Some of your classic riffs are a little sloppy
 Really? Huh
 And I, I hope you're not pissed off at me
 But I went and hired a dude
 Yeah?
 Yeah
 Oh no, what?
 Dude, just give it a chance will you?
 If you don't like, hey, I swear, if you don't like it
 We'll fuckin' fire his ass, he's out
 Who is this guy? I've never
 His name is Felix Char
 Oh, what?
 He's from Spain and he is the best
 I got him from the fuckin' London Field S'armonic
 I just, I don't know him, it seems weird, I
 Would you just, will you spend a minute with him?
 Okay, alright, I'll spend a minute with him
 He's right outside, I'm sending him in
 Oh, God, okay
 Why? Lessons, so stupid
 Hello?
 H-hi
 Hello, I am Felix Char
 Hi, uh, Felix, yeah, who
 Is, uh, Jack has asked me to spend some time with you
 Oh, yeah, okay
 Uh, one on one
 So, while Jack is outside, we will work on your technique
 Okay
 Can I see your, pickup, eh, is this your guitar here?
 Yeah, I got it right, I got it
 Ah, it is a Fender, huh? Is this a Fender?
 Oh, well, it's a Gibson
 Yes, a Gibson, yes, made by the same, uh, manufacturer
 Pick it up, please, can you pick it up?
 Okay, yeah
 No-to-to-to-to-pa-pa-pa-pa
 What? What'd I do? What'd I do?
 You pick it up from the neck
 This is not the way you pick up a guitar
 I just picked it up, I just
 No no, hey hey hey hey
 Cayate tu boca
 You pick it up from the body, okay?
 The what?
 The body
 Oh the body, okay, okay
 I'm sorry about my accent
 I didn't know, I didn't know
 Now listen to me
 I want to you to play like it is a woman
 You go and play the guitar now, play
 Uhh, okay, uhh
 No no no no no
 Your fingers, your fingers are too tight
 They're too tight?
 Yes, let me get behind you like this, you see
 If I put my finger on your finger, then you can feel
 What? Hey, I can play, just
 Shu-shu-shu-shu-shu
 Just let me play
 Finger to your mouth, I put my, my finger on your mouth
 On your lips, yes that's good
 Hey, man, what are you?
 Relax, hey, you want to play like an orgasm
 I'm just try, what?
 Feel this, do you feel that?
 Oh God, this is really weird man
 That's, that's my cock
 What?!
 It's my cock in your butt cheeks
 Oh God, hey!
 You feel it?
 Ow!
 Now I'm going to touch your cock, let me touch your penis
 It's me, it's me
 What?!
 It's JB, there's no Felix dude
 God, what are you doing?
 There's no Felix
 I'm fucking waking you up!
 And trying to shake your foundations
 By touching me with your penis?
 Yes, by fucking touching your penis, whatever it takes
 God!
 That's all I'm saying, dude, I'm making a point
 Let's get fucking serious, let's get fucking physical!
 Alright, let's take it from the top