Mind of My Own

It's four o' clock
 The TV's on
 My mind is shut off and my own thoughts are gone
 I change the channel
 I change my mind
 I change my life I want to leave it all behind
 'Cause I don't have a mind of my own
 I am influenced by everything I see
 And I can't help it now
 Everything in my life just thinks for me
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 Can't help this habit I'm in love with my disease
 Worshiping my idle time a life I cannot seize
 Trapped by depression and I sleep all day
 But Zanax, Valium, Attavan makes it all ok!
 It's so much more than a cry for attention
 No loving hands can soothe this ache
 So much more than a war with the world
 It's my own degradation it's my own self hate
 I preach my pessimism
 Right out loud to anyone who'll listen
 I'm not afraid to be alive
 I'm afraid to be alone!
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 Late at night my monsters find me
 From under the bed or right out of my past
 All alone with nobody to talk to
 Sanity gets put to the test
 I close my eyes but I'm still haunted
 Sometimes I get too twisted to sleep
 As all my world crumbles all around me
 Inspirations become admissions of defeat
 'Cause I don't have a mind of my own
 I don't have a mind of my own
 I don't have a mind of my own
 Everything in my life just thinks for me