Waverly

There's a restaurant in the East Village
 Where all the waiters are celebrities
 My first love waited hours in the back
 Making brazen advances toward Waverly
 There's lore of a movie star leaving
 His number for her on an old receipt
 All I know is that she didn't call him
 What a mystery, Waverly
 Hey, I live across the street and
 Wanted to know if you'd be my friend
 Won't call again
 I'm a patron dressed up like a person
 I'm a creature instead of me
 Dark at night and sunlight in the morning
 Decide that I'll try aging gracefully
 Here are all of my friends and my parents
 This is my birthday party
 You can push all the tables together
 But you can't pull one over on Waverly
 Hey, I live across the street and
 Wanted to know if you'd be my friend
 Won't call again