Cold Hard Facts of Life

(Bill Anderson)
 I got back in town a day before I'd planned to
 I smiled and said I'll sure surprise my wife
 I don't think I'll phone I'll just head on home
 For I didn't know the cold hard facts of life.
 I passed a little winestore on the corner
 I pictured pink champagne by candle light
 I stopped the car right then got out and hurried in
 My mind not on the cold hard facts of life.
 A stranger stood there laughing by the counter
 He said I'll take two bottles of your best
 Her husband's out of town and there's a party
 He winkled as if to say you know the rest.
 I left the store two steps behind the stranger
 From there to my house his car stayed in sight
 But it wasn't till he turned into my drive that I learned
 I was witnessing the cold hard facts of life.
 I drove around the block till I was dizzy
 Each time the noise came louder from within
 And then I saw our bottle there beside me
 And I drank a fifth of courage and walked in.
 Lord you should've seen their frantic faces
 They screamed and cried please put away that knife
 I guess I'll go to hell or I'll rot here in this cell
 But who taught who the cold hard facts of life.
 Who taught who the cold hard facts of life...