five minutes writing from the bottom

This sound different in the headphones but fuck it
 Ay, ay
 Fathers get surprised when they don't hear from you
 Same fathers thinking that they lies just don't appear to you
 Same fathers goin' through they lives without a shred of truth
 Pained fathers cheatin' on they wives without a hint of guilt
 Rest in peace to granny, to your brother, and your mama
 My lesson stings 'cause family structure built around your drama
 I'm sorry to my brothers as they grow up like I grew up
 With a dungeon as they hell, and they heaven in the sewers
 Was 11 when I grew up
 My mama told me "You hit rock bottom," I ain't even blink
 "Twice I told you 'bout your problem brawler, you ain't even think"
 Twice smack across my fuckin' face and I can't even love right
 My bitch ain't doin' nothing wrong and I can't even love right
 My ink is begging for this song and I can't even love write
 You throwin' channels 'cross my room and all I got this one mic
 I got a fuckin grass tattooed, and Ion' even love fight
 I can't even find it in me
 Ay, ay
 I'm dodgin' you, my mama whining wit' me, Ion' got the time to hit her
 Ion' got the patience for the love of my life
 I say I trust her, but I'm fakin' just to trudge through the night
 I say I love her, but I'm vacant when I discover my plight
 My whole perception of her changes when its drugs in my sight
 Or when its drugs in her eyes
 Or when she wit' bitches Ion' trust
 Or when I venture too far
 Or when it ventures too rough
 And when these bitches do call
 I don't intend to pick up
 I know these niggas get at you
 I know one day you gon' get out
 I push the truth through the South
 This shit just flew through my mouth
 This was no act in my doing, I don't know who this about
 I don't know who gonna hear this
 And I'm approaching 18
 I'm losing youth in my spirit
 And I'm approaching gangrene
 That's just how I'm shooting my feet
 I'm at a school I can't pay for
 I'm off a boot I can't stay for
 I'm with a group I ain't made for
 I ask myself "What this pain for?"
 I ask myself "What death waitin' on?"
 I ask myself