West Side Story (Original Broadway Cast): Act II: Gee, Officer Krupke

Dear kindly Sergeant Krupke
 You gotta understand
 It's just our bringin' up-ke
 That gets us out of hand
 Our mothers all are junkies
 Our fathers all are drunks
 Golly Moses, naturally we're punks
 Gee, Officer Krupke, we're very upset
 We never had the love that ev'ry child oughta get
 We ain't no delinquents
 We're misunderstood
 Deep down inside us there is good!
 There is good!
 There is good, there is good
 There is untapped good!
 Like inside, the worst of us is good!
 (That's a touchin' good story
 Lemme tell it to the world!
 Just tell it to the judge)
 Dear kindly Judge, your Honor
 My parents treat me rough
 With all their marijuana
 They won't give me a puff
 They didn't wanna have me
 But somehow I was had
 Leapin' lizards! That's why I'm so bad!
 Officer Krupke, you're really a square
 This boy don't need a judge, he needs an analyst's care!
 It's just his neurosis that oughta be cured
 He's psychologic'ly disturbed!
 I'm disturbed!
 We're disturbed, we're disturbed
 We're the most disturbed
 Like we're psychologic'ly disturbed
 (Hear ye, Hear ye, in the opinion on this court
 This child is depraved on account of he ain't had a normal home
 Hey, I'm depraved on account I'm deprived!
 So take him to a headshrinker)
 My father is a bastard
 My ma's an S.O.B.
 My grandpa's always plastered
 My grandma pushes tea
 My sister wears a mustache
 My brother wears a dress!
 Goodness Gracious!
 That's why I'm a mess!
 Yes! Officer Krupke, you're really a slob
 This boy don't need a doctor
 Just a good honest job
 Society's played him a terrible trick
 And sociologically, he's sick!
 I am sick!
 We are sick, we are sick
 We are sick, sick, sick
 Like we're sociologically sick
 In my opinion, this child does not need to have his head shrunk at all
 Juvenile delinquency is purely a social disease
 Hey, I got a social disease!
 So take him to a social worker
 Dear kindly social worker
 They say gotta earn some dough
 Like be a soda jerker
 Which means like be a shmo!
 It's not I'm anti-social
 I'm only anti-work!
 Gloryoskee! That's why I'm a jerk!
 Officer Krupke, you've done it again
 This boy don't need a job
 He needs a year in the pen!
 It ain't just a question of misunderstood
 Deep down inside him
 He's no good!
 I'm no good!
 We're no good, we're no good, we're no earthly good
 Like the rest of us is no damn good
 The trouble is he's lazy
 The trouble is he drinks
 The trouble is he's crazy
 The trouble is he stinks
 The trouble is he's growing
 The trouble is he's grown
 Krupke, we've got troubles of our own
 Gee, Officer Krupke we're down on our knees
 'Cause no one wants a fella with a social disease
 Gee Officer Krupke, what are we to do?
 Gee, Officer Krupke
 Krup you!