Tango: Maureen

Mark?
 Yeah, you must be Joanne
 I told her not to call you
 That's Maureen, but can I help since I'm here?
 I've hired an engineer
 Great
 So nice to have met you
 Wait!
 She's three hours late
 
 The samples won't delay but the cable
 There's another way
 Say something, anything
 Test one, two, three
 Anything but that
 This is weird
 It's weird
 Very weird
 Super weird
 I'm so mad that I don't know what to do
 Fighting with microphones
 Freezing down to my bones
 And to top it all off, I'm with you
 Feel like going insane
 Got a fire in your brain
 And you're thinking of drinking gasoline
 As a matter of fact
 Honey, I know this act
 It's called the Tango: Maureen
 The Tango: Maureen
 It's a dark, dizzy, merry go round
 As she keeps you dangling
 (You're wrong)
 Your heart, she is mangling
 (It's different with me)
 And you toss and you turn 'cause her cold eyes can burn
 Yet you yearn and you churn and rebound
 I think I know what you mean
 The Tango: Maureen
 Has she ever pouted her lips and called you, "Pookie?"
 Never
 Have you ever doubted a kiss or two?
 This is spooky
 Did you swoon when she walks through the door?
 Every time, so be cautious
 Did she moon over other boys?
 Oh, more than moon
 I'm getting nauseous
 ♪
 Where'd you learn to tango?
 With the Spanish ambassador's daughter in her dorm room at Ms. Porters
 And you?
 With Nanette Himmelfarb
 The rabbi's daughter at the Scarsdale Jewish Community Center
 It's hard to do this backwards
 You should try it in heels
 She cheated
 She cheated
 Maureen cheated
 Yeah, she cheated
 I'm defeated, I should give up right now
 Gotta look on the bright side with all of your might
 I'd fall for her still anyhow
 When you're dancing her dance
 You don't stand a chance
 Her grip of romance makes you fall
 So you think might as well
 Dance a tango to hell
 At least, I'll have tangoed at all
 The Tango: Maureen
 Gotta dance 'til your diva is through
 You pretend to believe her
 'Cause in the end, you can't leave her
 But the end, it will come
 Still you have to play dumb
 'Til you're glum and you bum and turn blue
 Why do we love when she's mean?
 And she can be so obscene
 Try the mic
 My Maureen
 We're patched
 Thanks
 You know, I feel great now
 I feel lousy
 ♪
 Hi, honey, we're
 Pookie? You never called me, "Pookie"
 Forget it, we're patched
 The Tango: Maureen