Unemployed Boyfriend

*Hi this is Peggy, leave me a nice message or I'll kill ya!
 -- Hey Peggy, it's me.
 You are never going to believe what happened to me today.
 I'm sitting at the unemployment office
 Waiting on my loser of a case worker
 In one of those nasty chairs
 When from out of nowhere
 This total stranger walks right up to me, sits down
 then leans over and says something like
 "This is going to sound a little obsessive..."*
 *This is going to sound a little obsessive
 This is going to sound a little bit strange
 I have one thing to say
 Before I turn and I walk away
 This is going to sound a little impulsive
 This is going to sound a little insane
 I know you don't know me yet
 but you and I
 we will be together
 Someday
 Someday
 I know ... I know ... I sound like I'm on drugs
 But listen to me when I say.
 That ever since I first saw you
 Sitting on your car outside you asked for a cigarette
 I couldn't stop staring at your eyes
 Ever since when I first saw you
 Looking bored in that plastic chair
 With the lights of the office around you
 Those blonde streaks
 they look so pretty in your black hair
 You look cool and alternative with that disaffected stare
 Yeah, You want people to think that you just don't care
 Hey you can be with me 'cause I just might be the one
 Who will treat you like you're perfect
 Who will always make you cum
 Hey, You can be with me
 I will always let you win
 I will never be like those other guys
 I will never be your unemployed boyfriend
 --Can you believe he said that to me?!?
 To me, of all people!
 I can't even remember the last time when a guy took me out on a date and actually paid for it
 *This is going to sound a little bit out there
 Yeah this is going to sound a little insane
 But I keep having the same dream
 That you will be the mother of my children someday
 Someday.
 I've heard you sleep with that obnoxoius guy
 I know he is in that famous band
 You look so sad when you are with him
 Yes, I never see him reach to hold your hand
 You can be with me, yes I will treat you like a queen
 I will go to all those chick flick movies
 That I really don't want to see
 You can be with me
 no I will never let you down
 I will never make out with your girlfriends
 When I know you're not around
 You can be with me
 Yeah I just might be the one who will treat you like you're special
 I will always make you cum
 You can be with me
 I will always let you win
 I will never be like those other guys
 I will never be like those other guys!
 I will never be your unemployed boyfriend!
 --Can you believe this?
 I mean, can this be for real?!?
 Then he takes my hand, writes down his number, and just walks away
 I mean, WOW
 But you know, the weird thing is, he's actually kinda cute,
 in a really intense way, ya know like Barry Farell
 Intense but sensitive, anyway i told my bitch big sister about it
 and she just laughed at me, i told her i was really exited about this guy
 i said this could be the guy