Everything Happens to Me

I make a date for golf -
 And You can bet you life it rains
 I try to give a party
 And the guy upstairs complains
 I guess I'll go thru life
 Just catchin' colds and missin' trains
 Everything happens to me
 I never miss a thing
 I've had the measles and the mumps
 And every time I play my ace
 My partner always trumps
 I guess I'm just a fool
 Who never looks before he jumps
 Everything happens to me
 At first my heart thought
 You could break this jinx for me
 That love would turn the trick
 To end despair
 But now, I just can't fool this head
 That thinks for me
 I've mortgaged all my castles in the air
 I telegraphed and called
 I sent an "Air Mail Special", too
 Your answer was goodbye
 And there was even postage due
 I fell in love just once
 And then it had to be with you
 Everything happens to me
 Inst
 I guess I'm just a fool
 Who never looks before he jumps
 Everything happens to me
 At first my heart thought
 You could break this jinx for me
 That love would turn the trick
 To end despair
 But now, I just can't fool this head
 That thinks for me
 I've mortgaged all my castles in the air
 I telegraphed and called
 I sent an "Air Mail Special", too
 Your answer was goodbye
 And there was even postage due
 I fell in love just once
 And then it had to be with you
 Everything happens, Everything happens
 Everything happens to me