the hating tree

do you want to know what this has done to me?
 the rage pours down into pools of grieving
 oh and your smiles turn to leprosy
 turn to sickness spread into your hearts
 and the pain sinks roots which smother all
 but have borne a seedling - a life of hatred and distrust
 you lied in ways. . . you never should have spoken
 acceptance conditional
 your honesty with fingers crossed behind my back
 become the blade that stabs me over and over and over and over again
 this time the betrayal is forever
 this time will have been the last time
 i believe
 to have given my self away
 but now there is a new me
 so proud to be the hating tree
 my arms out-stretched - they will withstand most everything
 now there is a new me
 so sad to be the hating tree
 as an offering i gave oh me, my self
 the madness and the laughter
 insight
 a love so full
 and a mirror that once told me to believe again
 now cries with me for the loss
 i know too well
 oh and the pain sinks roots which smother all
 but have borne a seedling - a life of hatred and distrust
 for you lied in ways. . . you never should have spoken
 acceptance conditional
 your honesty with fingers crossed behind my back
 become the blade that stabs me over and over and over and over again
 but this time the betrayal is forever
 this time will have been the last time
 i believe
 to have given my soul away
 now there is a new me
 so proud to be the hating tree
 my arms out-stretched - they will withstand most everything
 now there is a new me
 so sad to be the hating tree