Carry Me Home

The bartender's working on a late night shift
 Cheap blondes and bums and barmaids on a midnight drift
 And the dance band's playing the same old slam
 I'm sinking whiskey and you're sipping fine wine
 I don't know what it is you're trying to prove
 Well it should be you but it's me who can hardly move
 And I've got my reputation lying on the line
 Come on baby, be a good dog and help the blind
 Oh, won't you carry me home
 Won't you carry me home
 Won't you carry me home
 Like a truck, pick me up
 You ain't no lady but you've sure got taste in men
 That head of yours has got you by time and time again
 My arms and legs are aching and my head's about to blow
 And your back's been breakin' and I'd hate to spoil the show
 But I've just spent next weeks wages and I'm right out of coin
 But you want more and it's half past four and they want to close the joint
 But we can't afford a taxi and it's too late for the bus
 But I've been told by friends of mine you're someone I can trust
 Carry me home
 Oh, won't you carry me home
 Carry me home
 Don't let me lie here in all this beer
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 You drank all your booze and half of mine
 I'm bleary eyed and you're waiting for the sunshine to come and kill me
 Just like the man who threw me on the floor
 Don't matter, while I'm down here I might as well try and find the fucking door
 Excuse me, have you seen it? It's about this big
 And have you got a plastic bag 'cause I'm gonna be sick
 I'm dead drunk and heave'n, hanging upside down
 And you're getting up and leaving, you think I'm gonna drown
 Carry me home
 Oh, won't you carry me home
 Carry me home
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 Carry me home
 Oh, won't you carry me home
 Oh, carry me home
 Ah, ha ha ha ha